Rules for dating my doughter
If you think that you will have opportunities to explore your sexual activity with my daughter you will find out that I will be the only type of birth control that you will need.There will be no text messaging, video chatting; late night cell phone calls either because I will be watching…everything.
However, In order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. t you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?Rule #1 If you plan on taking my daughter on a date and come to my house and honk your horn or call her cell phone you'd better be the UPS man, because you are not picking anything up.Rule #2 If you touch my daughter be prepared to have removal of the touching limbs from your body in any such way that I feel appropriate.The same goes for your wandering eyes, if they go anywhere below eye level I will ask you to leave the premises as soon as possible, if you do not comply I will take action that I feel is necessary (i.e. Rule #3 I am aware that the so-called latest fashion trends mean that you wear your jeans several sizes too big so that your underwear shows or that you wear jeans known as "girl pants" for boys that are so tight they contour every area of your lower extremities and also expose your underwear.Please don't be embarrassed but you look ridiculous and so do your friends. Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you? You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter.
As a dad, I have some basic rules, which I have carved into two stone tablets that I have on display in my living room. Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me. Rule Five: In order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is ? Rule Six: I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls.
When you get to know our daughter, you’ll get to know us too. So be sure you’re comfortable with me seeing what you’re sending.
I will ask you a lot of questions and make sure you know that I know how special my daughter is. No, I’m not going to be nosey, rude or obsessive about it But, if my daughter’s phone just happens to be laying on the table, and I see she’s gotten a text, I might take a look at it.
Places where there is dancing or alcoholic beverages, joy or holding hands, all of these are also prohibited.
Places where there is darkness are not even an option.
If you want to date our daughter, we will try to figure out what kind of boy you are, before you spend time with her.