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Dating tips for smart guys

dating tips for smart guys-29

Women like you really turn these guys on, but the key word here is It’s not unusual for men over 40 to say that smart, successful women tend to compete on dates, when all they want to do is relax and have a nice time.And once they feel you’re “one of those” it’s over for you. He takes you to a nice restaurant and you have the best table in the house.

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Back in the day — before women became more independent (thanks, women's rights movement! For the most part, dating was easier: A man courted a woman and both of them knew the end goal if courtship went well: marriage.You’d make adjustments if you alienated your co-workers and wanted to feel better from 9-5 every day. And a big reason you struggle to connect with men is because you’re so bright. Like many of you, I’m a bit of an intellectual snob. Now before you decide that you hate me, I’d like you to consider two things: First, does that description remind you of any of the men you’ve dated in the past? On the other you get a narcissistic, difficult, self-obsessed, coldly logical man who is much more concerned with ideas than feelings, and much more concerned with himself than with you. Let’s face it: you’ve seen and done a lot, and anything he offers you can probably do for yourself.The problem is that the men you want are the ones who want to impress you. Does that describe anybody else besides those brilliant men you’re drawn to? And I wouldn’t be all that shocked if it somewhat described you as well. And I put up with the same things that you have to deal with from men – selfishness, difficulty, self-righteousness and so on. Because most of our lives are not spent discussing the finer points of Proust, or the best way to fix the 2-party system, or the science behind String Theory… My wife hasn’t done any of that personal growth stuff and you know what?

But I spent the first 35 years of my life chasing women who were just like me – the smartest women in the room. Have you ever been with a brilliant guy who is, at heart, a miserable person? And I’ll bet you’d do it again – hoping for a different ending this time. My female friends want it all, height, money, intelligence, looks, full head of hair etc…the guys i know who have it all(for the most part) are happy with a fun, attractive girl.

So while I’m not judging you for being just like I am – I AM pointing out to you that if you insist that you can ONLY be attracted to men who are smarter than you, you are relegating yourself to less than 2% of the population (before we consider things like looks, height, money, religion, humor, charm, attraction, values, etc.) Moreover, you’re relegating yourself to a man who is NOT A GOOD FIT FOR YOU. Thus, my wife doesn’t HAVE to be like me – because we’re great together.

And when two people who are that smart, that opinionated, and that strong-willed get together, it should obvious that sparks will fly – and tensions will mount. And yet you still hold your boyfriend to a ridiculous standard, as if a man who went to a state school and doesn’t watch Sunday morning political talk shows is a dullard. I married a woman who was smart – who gets every joke, who knows about Shakespeare and classical music, who has definite opinions about Israel/Palestine – but she’s not necessarily in the 98th percentile of intellectual curiosity. our time is usually spent talking about fixing up the house, raising our daughter, planning our next vacation, figuring out what we’re going to have for dinner, etc.

On one side, you get a brilliant, stimulating mind, which really turns you on… Before I forget, there was one other thing I wanted you to consider: Very smart.

Sounds like the price you pay for dating a great conversationalist is pretty steep, huh?

Then, if you feel it’s still significant, tell him about your connections and your clients later. As the conversation continues, he asks you about your business. You tell him you run/work for a company that helps large businesses with all their financial needs.